Thursday, October 27, 2016

I'm coin operated! There I said it!!

Hard to admit, but it is true! I know and I am fully aware of the benefits of being able to have my own business and making my own money. Not only for the economic part of it but also for the change in how I view the possibilities of becoming a better person for it, learning and being able to teach others to find there way to a better life style and most importantly a more positive life.

It think that trying to stop being a coin operated monkey is more like being an addict. ounce your hooked to it , it's hard to stop. One needs to go to a rehab to stop being addicted to it. I guess you can say that rehab in this case would be surrounding myself with people that are living the life that I dream to living, and reading self development, business development, and health development books. Surrounding myself with positive minded people that have been where I am know.

But before I do this I have to come clean with myself, admit to myself that I am a coin operated human being and genuinely confirm and commit myself to taking steps to becoming a self motivated business woman that I can see myself aiming toward my own goals and dreams. (easier said then done...) I don't know why but as I write this, it seems like I know what I want, but I can feel this doubt in my heart. Why?

Negative heart? I think this it do to the fact that being a coin operated person, not making the time to seek knowledge and feed my brain with positive things has lead me to feel poor of myself. Like everything positive that I can think of can become shot down with the slightest negativity. Where I work, I see this allot , people shooting down other peoples dreams and ideas. I realize know that people that live in a coin operated world, believe that having a rank is what empowers them to look down on others. The job position that I hold seems to make people at work think that I am not a smart person and that maybe I am only good for the job that I hold at the moment. ( I am a Housekeeper) But I am not stupid! I know that I am procrastinating in showing my talents to the world. I know I can do more and I know it is time to progress and help other people excel at there dreams to.

I don't want to be a leader, because I am a leader! I don't ever want to say "I want to" because
"I AM!" I believe that is my biggest mistake, To say I want to when in reality I need to say I AM. There is a difference, the kind of difference that you can feel it in your Heart! It's like a feeling of pride that over whelms me so much that it brings me to tears of happiness. "like when I sing the Pledge of Allegiance, it fills me with pride and make me cry with happiness."

This is only the beginning.... but for know it's bed time! Baby step, baby steps...